Review: Alex, Approximately by Jenn Bennett

You’ve Got Mail modernized, with badass teenagers. Alex, Approximately by Jenn Bennett (5/5)

The stars really aligned for me to read this book on Saturday (April 15), as there was a Doctor Who reference about midway through, and it was also an excellent distraction as I waited for the 10th series premiere. I have not been excited about a companion in quite some time as I am about Bill – she’s going to be amazeballs.

Anyway. Alex, Approximately by Jenn Bennett was released April 4, 2017 – I purchased it on April 3,2017 because someone (and I can’t figure out who) retweeted it or responded to Jenn’s tweet, and I was like – You’ve Got Mail retelling? I AM IN FOR THIS. I love that movie so much, and I still cry all the tears.

From Amazon:

Classic movie buff Bailey “Mink” Rydell has spent months crushing on a witty film geek she only knows online by “Alex.” Two coasts separate the teens until Bailey moves in with her dad, who lives in the same California surfing town as her online crush.

Faced with doubts (what if he’s a creep in real life—or worse?), Bailey doesn’t tell Alex she’s moved to his hometown. Or that she’s landed a job at the local tourist-trap museum. Or that she’s being heckled daily by the irritatingly hot museum security guard, Porter Roth—a.k.a. her new arch-nemesis. But life is whole lot messier than the movies, especially when Bailey discovers that tricky fine line between hate, love, and whatever-it-is she’s starting to feel for Porter.

And as the summer months go by, Bailey must choose whether to cling to a dreamy online fantasy in Alex or take a risk on an imperfect reality with Porter. The choice is both simpler and more complicated than she realizes, because Porter Roth is hiding a secret of his own: Porter is Alex…Approximately.


As always, summaries do so little justice to the books they represent, because good books cannot be summed up in a few paragraphs. This book, while hilarious and delightful, is not light or even fluffy. This isn’t about romance as much as it’s about figuring out how to still connect with people despite pain, trauma, and responsibilities. It’s about how complicated our family ties really are, and that your family makes you into an adult – for better or worse. This book was great.

One of the things I struggle with in contemporary YA is that the teens often jump to conclusions about the adults, or misinterpret events in such a way that even the reader is like – what is wrong with you? I love that this book doesn’t do that, even a little bit. There’s no ambiguity to the adults – if they aren’t direct, someone around the characters comes out and clears things up in some way. It doesn’t mean all the adults are good and good parents and like the teenagers, just that you don’t jump to conclusions.

Recently, I read an article about the Hate U Give and about how Angie Thomas brought family back to YA – I think this is another example of that. Family and familial relationships are integral to this story, and to Bailey’s journey. It also clearly demonstrates that some people just fail at being a parent, and sometimes it’s because they have to take care of themselves as an individual human when they have the space to do so.

This next thing I’m going to try and talk about without spoilers. Bad stuff has happened to both Bailey and Porter. What happened to Bailey is probably my greatest fear, as someone who often holds people accountable for their actions and is part of separating them from their education, that’s the shit I have nightmares about. And I’ll be honest, when the storyline was first hinted at I thought it was going to be too over the top, or too much for a teen contemporary romance. But it wasn’t. It was impactful and delivered well and at the exact right moments in the story. It’s also sadly realistic for our world and it’s much easier to deny that than accept that it’s not such a crazy thing to include in a novel. It’s not even an extreme example. So yeah, some dark stuff happens but we get to see a teenage girl successfully working through her response to trauma. We also get to see her help someone else deal with their own, and it’s such a REAL moment. Like a punch in the feels kind of moment, but you’re okay with the bruise.

Believe me, this book is not light, and I’m going to keep saying that and I mean it as a compliment. The highest of compliments. It has very cute moments and Porter sounds very sexy, but some romance feels that it’s a slight shift away from reality because love is the center of the world. That’s not the case in Alex, Approximately – there’s so much more going on for both of these characters. You see them struggle, adapt, change, and realize things about themselves. Bailey is a great character to follow because you can both empathize with her, and want her to stretch and be more, or be who she wishes she was.

The best way I can sum up this novel is REAL. The characters and their experiences are such an accurate and sharp slice of real life. There’s teenagers doing sexy things and talking about it and being smart and figuring out what they want, and how to explore becoming a sexual being. Without being pornographic or exploitative. There’s teenagers falling in love and making mistakes and being scared and truly, deeply loving the nerd thing they are into. It’s teenagers thinking about the future without the cliche version of the “pressure from parents” plot. It’s people losing things and changing dreams and trying to protect the people they love. It’s people recognizing that we all have darkness inside, but we have light, too.

I give Alex, Approximately a 5/5 because I was hooked the entire time and read the book in one sitting. After the Doctor Who premiere I was going to go to bed, but I didn’t. I stayed up and finished this book. I was expecting a fun, romantic teen version of a fairly light film, and got something that was fun and romantic, but deep in scope. Definitely read this.

Review/Opinion: The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas

Read this book. The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas (5/5)

This will eventually be a review of The Hate U Give by Angie Thomas, the current and deserved ruler of the NYT Bestseller’s List. There are books that come along and are earth-shaterringly relevant and timely, and this is it. This book is now, this book is important, and it needs to be read with an open mind and an open heart. It is a perspective and worldview that might be unfamiliar, but it is one that more people need to read, hear, and believe.

From Amazon:

Sixteen-year-old Starr Carter moves between two worlds: the poor neighborhood where she lives and the fancy suburban prep school she attends. The uneasy balance between these worlds is shattered when Starr witnesses the fatal shooting of her childhood best friend Khalil at the hands of a police officer. Khalil was unarmed.

Soon afterward, his death is a national headline. Some are calling him a thug, maybe even a drug dealer and a gangbanger. Protesters are taking to the streets in Khalil’s name. Some cops and the local drug lord try to intimidate Starr and her family. What everyone wants to know is: what really went down that night? And the only person alive who can answer that is Starr.

But what Starr does—or does not—say could upend her community. It could also endanger her life.

But first, let’s talk about me.

If you want to give my job a fancy title, I’m a civil rights investigator. Narrowing it down, I work in the field of Title IX, which is a federal statute to respond to and prevent discrimination based on sex/gender/sexual orientation/gender identity/gender non-conformity in the higher education setting. Even more particularly, I respond to complaints of sexual harassment, sexual violence, intimate partner violence, and stalking made by a student. I spend a lot of my time talking about consent, rape culture, and healthy relationships.

It means that justice, access, and equity are huge values in my life. I also believe in an intersectional approach to my work, which means that even if my job description says my role is about gender, I look at someone’s life and how all their identities factor into their response, as well as how all of their identities inform what and why something happened to them. I can never let myself be pigeonholed into the thought “this is only about their gender” because rarely is that true. It also means that I am really intentional in being aware and informed about multiple identities and experiences so that I can find the best way to help a person tell their story, and communicate impact. There is so much about the work that I do that was impacted by THUG.

It reminded me of everything that I am fighting for and against, of who it is I am meant to take care of, and who I am meant to raise up so that they can be heard because I am not the speaker, I am the platform. The fact that this story is being lifted up makes it worth it to get up in the morning because I can hope against hope, for the first time in months, that I am not just banging my head against a wall. Change is coming, and change is here.

Okay, back to the book. Things I want to make clear from the start: I believe police violence is a problem. I know and work with some truly amazing police officers, but their role does not mean they get an exception for killing someone. It doesn’t mean they don’t make mistakes. It doesn’t mean there is not a cultural indoctrination within the law enforcement community to demonize colored bodies (and even officers of color buy into this indoctrination). We are not perfect, they are not perfect. There is room for progress, and a greater need to protect people of color from unfair enforcement and violence. BLACK LIVES MATTER – all lives matter, but we are failing people of color by refusing to acknowledge that they are disproportionately victims of violence. This is fact, not open for discussion, sorry not sorry.


So on that point, please recognize that Starr’s experiences are not a stretch of the imagination. The fiction contained in these pages is truer than you might know. If you are questioning the #ownvoices movement, this should prove their point to you.

I love Starr. I love that she is so self-aware, but that doesn’t make her perfect or easy, it makes her human.  It makes her a trustworthy narrator, and that was essential to this story. Because you trust Starr so much that others doubting her feels more than personal, it feels political. That is one of the true triumphs of this novel is making the personal political, and making you confront how that might be operating in your life. There’s a lot of messages, a lot of purpose and moral, written into the language and fabric of the narrative but it’s delicate. It makes you step away from the stories you’ve seen in the news, and instead stick with an individual person and their experience. By humanizing the one, it gives you the opportunity to humanize all.

The family dynamics are also easy to relate to – inter-generational conflict, the sins of the parents being visited on the children, how family expands and contracts, the ways in which we grow and change with our siblings, and how much they influence our decisions and reactions. This family, the Carters and their extended ties, are so tight and so beautiful. I loved reading about this family, because I could see my life and my family reflected there, and I could understand and follow the logic of their decisions, even when they were scary and might not work out. Lisa and Maverick are good parents and a good relationship, and I get why Starr called them her OTP.

The complexity of friendships for teenagers was also a wonderful aspect of AT’s writing. When you’re a teenager it can be incredibly difficult to confront problematic behavior or to risk losing friends because you disagree or don’t follow, or knowing that you drifted from or failed someone because it was easy to do it. That’s reality, and watching Starr maneuver those situations might help others – I think she’s braver than your average person (which is a comment I think Starr would find annoying) but it was also clear that her bravery influenced others. The bystander effect is real, y’all.

Some of my favorite things: Starr’s mom, Lisa; any and all of the Harry Potter references (the House gang theory is one I have believed in for years); all the times I had to Google shoes so that I had a visual; having an excuse to play the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme song repeatedly; DeVonte (he might be my favorite, after Starr); that family is more than blood and titles; the only act of violence in the novel I condoned and in fact, shouted out loud in excitement (it’s a punch in the face that is…magnificent and frankly, earned. My anti-violence inner-self is a work in progress, friends), THE LAST LINE ON PAGE 290.

I cannot wait to read whatever AT publishes next. Her writing pulls you in right from the first line – it was the kind of work that didn’t provide unnecessary details, but focused on what I needed to know to FEEL like I was there, both physically and emotionally. I felt like I inhabited Starr’s world and saw through her eyes – there are so many emotional blows and I f***ing felt them all, but I also felt her joy and laughter, her moments of recovery, and her moments of self-forgiveness. I know that a book is dynamic when my husband can’t keep up with my emotions – one second I’m crying (from both sadness and happiness in this one) and then I’m laughing, and there was also a lot of swearing.

I loved a lot of the characters in this book, but seriously Starr made my top 5 characters, all time. She’s still beat out by Tally, but Tally saved my life, so it’s kind of hard to let that crown shift. Maybe tied for first.

5/5 read, no question. GO GET THIS NOW. REQUEST IT AT YOUR LIBRARY. Bring it to your school, your community, your organizations. Let the conversation happen.